Development by 9 and 10 Years
Physical

• Perfecting motor skills
• Is able to care for own needs
• Some girls are approaching or may have reached puberty
• Boys often are more active and rough than girls

Cognitive

• Has original ideas and is able to make plans without adults
• Develops own opinions which may differ from yours
• Can understand logical reasoning
• Asserts leadership and independence

Social and Emotional

• Has selective friendships
• Interests include clubs and groups
• Has increased interest in competitive sports
• Will flirt with opposite sex by joking, teasing and showing off
• Acquires a conscience
• Usually affectionate towards parents, likes doing family activities
• Concerned with judgments and decisions being fair and justified

Development by 11 and 12 Years
Physical

• Increasingly aware of body images and changes occurring
• Capable of good hygiene habits
• Increased muscle growth
• Increased appetite
• Self-conscious about learning new skills

Cognitive

• Has the ability to use logic
• Understands abstracts
• Aware of moral codes
• Individual preferences influence choice of activities
• Challenges adult knowledge

Social and Emotional

• Interested in competitive team games
• Group membership is important (urge to conform)
• Respects parental controls
• Self-confidence turns to self-doubt; may be moody

Thoughts for Parents

• Provide time and space for your children to be alone. Time to read, daydream or do school work uninterrupted will be appreciated.
• Allow your child to help with cooking, cleaning and other activities around the house.
• Encourage your child to become involved in clubs or youth groups. This will encourage social skills as well as skill development with projects and activities.
• Encourage your older children to help with younger ones, but don't burden them with too many responsibilities. Allow them to be children.
• Allow your child to make phone calls to friends. This is an important time for your child to have close friends and feel as though he is part of a group.